How Jealousy Spurred Me to Make Biscuits

ok, so I guess I am a petty person. The other morning my lovely wife Rachelishungry decided to make some biscuits, and they turned out really nice. Light and fluffy, warm and tasty, just like her! minus the fluffy part of course…In other words her biscuits were the exact opposite of my many attempts at creating biscuits but actually making hockey pucks made of sawdust…I can cook almost anything, but a good biscuit has always eluded me for some reason which I have mentally swept under the kitchen rug for years…but  my wife’s biscuits made me so darn mad at myself i had to one up her and make even better biscuits, and by Jove and bu golly i think i did just that….sorry wifeishungry…i used an old recipe for Angel Biscuits from one of my vintage cookbooks…see, my biscuits were always too flat, like a can of pepsi sitting on the hood of a car in summer or the top of Glenn’s head…but the addition of yeast!?!?!?!?!?!? sounds like sacrilegious jibber jabber, but it sure did work..anyway..i ate one…lisaishungry ate one, catishungry ate one…somerandomladyintheshopishungry ate one…and we all agreed that they were the best biscuits ever made by anyone ever in the history of mankind, including your grandmother!!! yes YOU!!!!!<<<<<warning!!! the previous statement is probably not true in any way shape or form<<<<<<<

anywho, look at the pictures, yo! there’s even some pictures of the book store all up in this mofo!!! maybe even a PICTURE OF SOME POTATOES!!!!! FUDGE YES!!!! word to your mother..peace im out..abc-ya…drop the zero and get with the hero baby!!!!

 

 

Avocado French Fries…indeed!

Ok . So I want to start off with an apology for this post. Never again will you be able to eat another fried potato and not be pissed off cuz you’re not eating this. Basically you take an avocado, peel it, slice it, dip it in an egg wash, dip it in bread crumbs, then fry those suckers!

They are fairly delicate and cook quickly, but they are soooooooo delicious. I tried them with flour and corn  meal and they were good as well, but the bread crumbs really gave it the crunch to match the warm creaminess of the avocado. I served it with a Sri-Racha yogurt ranch kind of dip stuff.

The Poster Collection: Day Eight

I worked at a little hole in the wall/roach farm/ISS nightmare/underage-beer-provider/ chicken wing and beer joint located on the Strip in the early 90’s named Spicy’s. I worked both in the front and the back of the house at various times and witnessed some kitchen nightmares that would make Gordon Ramsey pee the bed.

As a caveat let me say this: the chicken wings , steak and cheese sammiches, and oriental bbq steak sammiches were ab=so=fucking=lutely deeeeelicious. Most of the recipes came from the original(?) owner, who was Asian. Not sure what part of Asia, but I really only met him once or twice as he rode off to California in his red Corvette( for realsies). The chicken wing sauce was very simple . yet unmatched in all my wing eating travels. The steak and cheeses were simple but fresh cut beef only because it was cheaper to pay someone almost nothing to cut it up than to buy it pre-made. The sauce for the oriental BBQ sammich was a sticky sweet concoction full of ginger and absurd amounts of garlic.  However…..

BULLET POINTS OF INSANITY FROM SPICY’S

• We used to buy whole chicken wings and cut them by hand into the little drummies and 2nd joints. We did this by removing the safety guard from the meat slicer and cutting the severing the wings joints upon the spinning blade of doom. It was hugely effective but terrifying.
• I saw the owner “allegedly” thaw a case of frozen chicken wings by running them thru the Hobart with the sopa hoses disconnected.
• Once, to save a buck or two, the owner tried using solid shortening in the fryers. While cleaning it, the shortening overflowed and covered the floor in a congealed mass of discount , off brand crisco.
• Roaches. Napkin Holders. Use your imagination. Then double that.
• Gaggles of 17 year olds drunk on 24 ounce can’s of Foster’s, some of Murvill’s best and brightest at the time
• We once sold 1600 pounds of chicken wings in a single day. This is part of why I really don’t like UT football games. Every Saturday home game is an exercise in torture if you work on the Strip
• Tables of Vol’s linemen on all-you-can-eat wing nights could consume upwards of 50 poounds of wings per table. The most I saw ever was a skinny dude who ate almost 130 wings.
• The owner of the building would sell parking spaces on gamedays, pack the cars in like sardines, and then leave. Noone could get out until the “key” cars were moved. Once mine was a “key” car and it was moved by a gang of about 8 guys into the middle of the street.
• Whiskey. Knives. Hot grease. What could go wrong?

Anywho, here are some posters of sheer awesomeness

 

Poster Collection: Day Seven….Some Goooood Stuff

I remember when I was in 5th grade we moved from Alcoa out to the county area known as Binfield.  I was put into Binfield Elementary and immediately started getting into trouble, mostly for being too smart. The most memorable was when we were starting simple division, FOR THE FIRST TIME<that’s right, “we” were just starting to learn division at the end of the 5th grade year.  At Alcoa we had been learning this, oh I don’t know, the WHOLE DAMN TIME we were in school, so I had a wee bit of a head start/ Let me say this, I am not making fun of anyone who went to county schools, but more so the schools themselves.

Anywho, the question posed to the class was “what is 9 divided by 3?” Well I answered it immediately and was quickly admonished and ushered out of the classroom, aka a trailer, at which point I was whooped with a paddle. Ahhhh, the good old days when you could hit kids with a large stick! The same teacher also paddled everyone in the class for being too loud at lunch one day. Every single kid, even the quiet ones. You know, spare the rod, spoil the child kind of thing. The same teacher also sent home a pamphlet warning us of the impending Rapture. My rather liberal parents didn’t care too much for that, and I thought it was laughable at best.

The only thing they could do after that was to make me sit in with the 8th graders during class so I didn’t get too bored.

Hey look posters!

Poster Collection: Day Six…

I lived in Fort Sanders while pretending to attend college at the University of Tennessee in my early twenties. One house I lived in was on the corner of 11th and Laurel. It is no longer there, but at the time it was a 3 story house converted into apartments, mine being the attic. It had sloped ceilings and a claw foot tub and you could climb out on the roof and yell obscenities at passer-bys with relative anonymity. My downstairs neighbor was none other than Rus Harper of Teenage Love and Neowizard fame, so needless to stay there were occasionally very interesting gatherings. On Saturdays the Big Orange wave of Humanity came crushing down on the Fort and our land/slumlord had a very bad habit of selling off our yard as a large parking lot. We were left to find parking the night before and hope our cars were not towed or carried away by gangs of hooligans.

Anywho, we had us a fine party this particular home game Saturday and were whooping it up on the front porch, hollering rather inappropriate things to pedestrians and their wives and their (sorry)children. After a threat of violence or two the party logically migrated upstairs to the attic and out onto the roof. I was always a little scared to go out there but braved it anyway. We looked down upon the sea of cars littering our normal hang out area and decided they were not nearly orange enough. So. After a short lived and half-hearted look around, we happened upon the orangest thing we could find: American Cheese. Really cheap American cheese-like food product to be precise, which flies remarkably well and makes a lovely splat when meeting a windshield with all the force the three story cheese free fall could muster. After the supply of cheese bombs was used up, we decided the best thing to do would be to leave for the day and seek comfort in the arms of friends outside of the upcoming impact zone of the horrors of baked on “cheese”.

Here are some posters by the way

Random Photos and Thoughts

Hi folks…sorry I have been AWOL from the blogosphere. Work has been waaay to “work” lately. The new cheffin’ gig is going well, but the Country Club in question is going to the auction block in 6 days, so I may well be looking for employment. I’ve got nothing but good feed back from the menu and the specials, and i rally hope my new Golf Club Overlords decide to keep the status quo …anywho…here’s some pictures: look at them and tell me how cool they and/or I am! 

Steveishungry Goes Country! well, more country

Well folks, despite setbacks life goes on and that means Steveishungry will be Popping Up this month at Southland Books and Coffeeshop, back open under old management. The menu this time will pay homage to the Southern heritage I have at times tried my hardest to escape from, but which i now embrace wholly…sooo here is the rough draft for dinner on January 19th…call lisa at 984-4847 or , even better, sign up on facebook to attend the event…

APPETIZERS:

Pulled Pork and Purple Haze Slaw wrapped up in flour tortillas and grilled, served with moonshine peach dippin’ sauce

Sweetwater Vintage Cheddar and Scallion Biscuits with local honey butter

Benton’s Bacon and Sweetwater Valley Gouda stuffed Tater Skins

House Salad :By Greens with  Avocado Buttermilk Dressing, Benton’s bacon, Pico de Gallo and Fresh Croutons

Zesty Beer Cheese and Potato Soup with Corn Bread Mini Muffins

ENTREES…..

Locally Sourced Meatloaf with Portabella Gravy, served on a bed of Real Mashed Taters and one side item

Grilled Chicken Cordon Blue made with Benton’s prosciutto and Sweetwater Valley, and Moonshine Peach BBQ sauce, served on a bed of rice with one side item

Shrimp, Benton’s Bacon and Avocado Panini with Spinach, Marinated Artichoke Hearts, Sweetwater Valley Cheese served with one side item

Grilled Portabella, Spinach and Swiss Cheese French Dip served with    one side

SIDE ITEMS:

Mashed taters, with or without gravy

Fried Corn, creamy and wholesome

Green Beans, chock full of garlic and bacon

BBQ Baked Beans, secret recipe!

5 Cheese Mac and Cheese

DESSERTS:

Banana Pudding

Whatever Else My Aunt Wants to Make

 

Well, there you go….I’m hungry just thinking about it…Prices will be more than reasonable, especially considering the quality of the local ingredients we’re going to use. This will be probably my best menu yet, methinks….This is the kind of food i can really put my self into..not literally of course, that would be gross.

Photo Bomb!

i hate to admit it, but i love my smartphone…having a nice camera and mp3 player and google searcher and gps and video game system and all around useful thing….sooo anywho, here are some pics from the aforementioned smartphone…dig em with  a shovel y’all!

Photographs…not the Def Leppard song, though, sorry

Ok, I know the song is actually Photograph, singular not plural with the s. Deal with it. That’s how I roll.

Anyway, I got a new phone that does coooool things like take pictures and keep me organized and let’s me play scrabble while driving down I-40 at 85 miles per hour. So look with your eyeholes and leave comments with your fleshy letter poking hand sticks

Pop Up Dinner at Southland, the Menu for the 23rd of July

Howdy folks, here is the menu for your early perusal…items may be added at the last minute, of course..

Appetizers:

Artichoke Bruschetta with Homegrown tomatoes and roasted garlic

Pesto and fresh bread

Crab stuffed Mushrooms with fresh herbs and local cheese

Pimento cheese stuffed Local tomatoes

Entrees:

Linguine with your choice of sauce, small green salad and garlic bread…chose from rustic tomato sauce, creole sauce, meaty marinara, or creamy pesto….add grilled shrimp or chicken for additional charge

Homemade Veggie or Meat lasagna with your choice of sauce, a small green salad and garlic bread

12 inch pizzas:

Margherit: garlic infused olive oil brushed on the crust, sliced tomatoes, mozzarella cheese and topped with fresh basil

Jerk chicken (or shrimp for extra charge),  jerk sauce on the crust, red onions, shredded carrots, diced jalapenos(or habaneros if youre ‘mon enough) mozzarella cheese and fresh cilantro

Salsa rustica, homemade italian sausage, pepperoni, onions, mushrooms and mozzarella…with fresh oregano

White pizza with spinach, artichoke hearts, roasted red peppers, mozzarella and grilled chicken( or shrimp for extra charge)

Desserts?!?!?!?!?!?! still thinking about that one…